Queso: Mag Mud Knock Off Edition

This is a really pedestrian version of Magnolia Cafe's Mag Mud. That's a restaurant in Austin I really miss. Well, more accurately, I miss the location that closed during the pandemic, but I’m not gonna talk smack about this location. They still serve Mud, after all! I went the super lazy route, not bothering to buy a tomato to make a proper pico (they make an excellent pico de gallo that goes in theirs), using the last of my pickled jalapeños instead of ponying up the 5 cents for a fresh one (Magnolia generally has slices of red and green chiles in theirs), and using entirely less cheese than one probably should use. I also didn't add the fresh items (avocado excepted) to the mix after it was cooked - I just dumped everything into the saucepan at once and let it figure itself out. I was really hungry and had a serious craving for this specific thing. What can I say?

If you want a less pedestrian knock off, they definitely abound on the intertoobz.

On the cheese front, I used less because I like my queso a lot more tomato-y than most people do. Since I'm the only one eating it (with pita chips! Endless pita chips!), I figured I should just do whatever I want. So that’s what I did. Normal people way is in parentheses in the ingredients section. I ate this as 2 meals, but mostly of the time this is served as an appetizer for several people.

Here’s what you’ll need

1/2 pound Velveeta or similar (1 pound)
1 can Ro-Tel tomatoes (I leave the juices in but I think a normal person wouldn't; use the same amount if you make the full recipe)
1 cup cooked and drained black beans (2 cups)
1/8 cup pickled jalapeños (1 fresh, sliced thinly)
1/8 red onion, diced (use pico here in place of the onion and bell pepper)
1/2 green bell pepper, diced
1/2 cup canned black olives, sliced (I don't think this is really supposed to be in there but I like olives so I don't care; this is about the same in the full version)
1 avocado, sliced or diced (at the restaurant, the avocado is sliced. I also have twice as much in mine as they put, so it’s the same amount for the full version)

Here’s what you’ll do

My way: Put everything but the avocado in a saucepan and turn it to low heat. Let it cook until the cheese is melted, stirring periodically. Add avocado and eat with chips. Serves 1.

The right way: Combine cheese and drained tomatoes in a saucepan and melt over low heat, stirring frequently. When melted, stir in beans, chiles, and olives if using. Or: you can put the beans on the bottom of the serving vessel then top with the queso and let your eaters stir it in themselves, which is my preference. Still do the chiles and olives when the cheese is melted, and then heat through whatever all is in that pot now.

Top with pico de gallo and avocado, then serve with chips. Serves 4-6.